December with 3in30

Baby S in her Christmas Best :)

My three goals for the month of December were as follows:

1. Start exercising again (I stopped exercising in June when I went into pre-term labor with my daughter, and haven't gotten back into a consistent schedule of exercise since).

2. Play with my daughter more (it is so easy to be distracted by technology and housework, I wanted to make a point of focusing more on her, instead of just having her along for the ride).

3. Pray every day (who doesn't need to improve in this area? It is a vital discipline for the Christian!).

Here's how I did:

1. On Exercise- Okay. My goal was just to do something, no matter how small. I exercised on average 1 or 2 days a week. Most of the time I did twenty minutes of a yoga video session. You know you are out of shape when yoga is enough to wear you out :/. I still have a lot of room for improvement in this area, both with frequency and variety- I really need to start kicking my butt with pilates and the treadmill :). So I will be focusing on this area again next month.

2. On Playing with S- Getting better! Although I didn't always set the timer for undistracted playtime, I made a point of putting my phone down, getting off the computer, and just enjoying S more. It wasn't hard, especially now that she is smiling so much :). She even tracks toys and various objects with her eyes now. Again, still something I want to keep focused on, but I think I really improved in this area.

3. On Prayer- Good. Almost every single week day I was able to get in at least 20 minutes. Ironically it was the weekend, especially the Lord's Day of all things, when I struggled. How is it that on a day set aside for worship and rest I didn't make time to pray??? This did improve as the month went on though. I've started Matthew Henry's A Way To Pray, very good, and I have been working on praying through passages of Scripture that I read.

How did you do on your goals this month?

What to do with that Leftover Holiday Turkey

The dirty work

 This week has been Turkey week in my house. As in, I picked clean the entire bird, made a giant pot of turkey stock, and cooked turkey meals like a wild woman. It was well worth the effort! Today I will be throwing several containers of soup and pot pie filling mixture into my freezer for later days in which I am un-inspired to cook. Success! Also, there is this empowering pioneer woman feeling that comes from making your own from scratch broth and picking clean an entire giant animal :).

Simmering the bones and other remains for stock

Lately I have been reading Trina Holden's e-book Real Fast Food. The timing was perfect, because in her book she explains the best way to make stock with the maximum nutritional benefit. Although I'd made my own stock before, I had no idea that you needed to boil it for a minimum of 12 hours to get all the good stuff out of the bones! I also learned a "secret" ingredient for drawing the good nutrients out. But it won't be a secret if you read her book :).

My soup

Finally, here is a very basic soup recipe that we enjoy. Bonus: it is very quick and easy to make! For four servings all you need is: 3-4 cups of broth, 1 cup of turkey (or chicken), 1 chopped carrot, 1 chopped stalk of celery (my husband doesn't like this, so I just add another carrot), 1/2 cup of noodles, and salt and pepper to taste. Simply bring the stock and carrots to a boil, add pasta, and cook until the pasta is done (about ten minutes). Add the meat, salt and pepper. Sometimes I use brown rice instead of pasta (it does take longer that way), and add frozen corn for a little bit of natural sweetness. Yesterday I made a quadrupile batch so that I had extras to freeze. We still have more meat, so I think we might be eating turkey quesadillas tonight :). Yum!

What things do you like to make with your leftover turkey meat?

Bible Reading Plan for 2012

(image via)

It's that time of year again; one year drawing to a close, the next one almost upon us. I am so excited! Niall and I have been busily planning things we want to work on as a couple and family for the new year. More about that in the week to come.

One thing I've been thinking about is how I am going to read through the Bible this year. For the past four years I have used the Discipleship Journal Bible Reading Plan, an excellent tool that I very much enjoyed. It has you reading through four things at all times- the Old Testament, Wisdom Literature, the Gospels, and the New Testament. This is nice because it really gives you a feel for Scripture as a whole, so often my readings in the Old Testament would correspond with what I was reading in the New Testament or Gospels. The biggest perk of this plan though is that it goes only 25 days each month, leaving you on average 6 catch-up days! Because of the extra breathing room, it was the first Read Through the Bible in a Year Plan that I actually finished. As I became more faithful and consistent over the years, actually staying on time with the plan, I would use the extra days at the end of each month for more detailed Scripture studying. It was a great plan and I highly recommend it!

Because I've been doing it for four years, I decided that it might be nice to try something fresh and new this year. A lot of people in my church use the McCheyne plan, and my husband thought he would like to give it a try. With it you will read through the Old Testament once, and the New Testament and Psalms twice. At this point I think I will probably join Niall, since I like the idea that we are reading the same portions of Scripture at the same time.

How about you? What plans have worked well for you in the past? What are you trying this year? I'd love to hear of different options! If you haven't made it a habit to read through the whole Scriptures yearly, why not start in 2012? It will be well worth your time!

He Knows What I Need

My sweet daughter S loves to be awake... only at night when I want to sleep it seems. Can you relate? Motherhood and sleeplessness are synonyms, right? So this is no surprise to me, because it has been the plight of mothers down through the centuries. I get it. And most of the time I can roll with it. One of the wonderful things about being a stay at home mom is naps :).

But then there are times, like last night, when I've just about hit my limit of sleep deprivation. This child cannot possibly be still awake! If I have to keep my eyes open for another second, I might die! It is cruel not only that you are awake, but that you actually have to function sanely, still being patient and sweet to the little baby who has no clue about the misery she is causing.

In these moments I have found peace and reassurance with one simple thought. He knows what I need. The Lord isn't out to get me, He won't push me beyond my limits. So if my daughter is still wide eyed and in need of care, He will equip me to handle it. He knows what I need.

I love Psalm 127:2- "it is in vain that you rise up early and go late to rest, eating the bread of anxious toil, for He gives to His beloved sleep." Amen! Music to a tired Mama's ears :). The Lord will give me the rest I need, when I need it. Let it sink in deep: He knows what we need!

One of those Days...

Today it's been just one of those days. Overslept, got up to feed a starving baby and send a sleepy husband running out the door. Still felt exhausted after feeding the babe, and after a 20 minute couch nap didn't revive me, I headed back to bed, feeling guilty, but more tired than anything else. Once I got up for good (at ten, yikes!) and was back on the couch feeding baby again, the despair started to descend.

"You've wasted half of the day! Look at this house! There is no way that you are going to be able to get it all accomplished. Think of your poor husband- he's tired too, but he's had to work all day anyway. What kind of lazy woman are you?"

Thank God that we don't have to succumb to these things. There have been days that I've dwelt in despair-land, but today I took a deep breath and decided to forget what was behind me (half of a wasted day). The good news is I still had half of a new and beautiful day ahead of me. There was no sense in dwelling on what couldn't be changed. I've done that before, and at the end of the day I was still tired, still bummed, and my untouched to do list was still looming like a dark cloud over me.

So instead I asked the Lord to help me where I was. He knows I am tired, and discouraged. He alone can give me the grace I need to face the rest of the day. Even though it didn't make me feel productive or like I was making a dent in the demands of my day, I took time out and prayed. And it helped. I was able to exercise, shower and get dressed, read my Bible, work on laundry. Now I am hitting the afternoon slump, but by His grace (and with the help of some pick me up caffeine :) ) I intend to finish the laundry, do the dishes and make dinner. Ready set go!

Are you doing the best you can today with a joyful heart? Or are you feeling overwhelmed and hopeless? What are some things that help you look to the Lord and persevere when you are tired and busy?

Things I Wish I'd Known from the Get-Go in the NICU

Feeding S by syringe through her NG tube, day four in the NICU.

1. The Doctor's don't tell you everything right away, and that is probably a good thing. With so many possibilities of different outcomes and complications, it would be information overload if they tried to tell you everything you might need to know eventually at the beginning. Your first few days in the NICU are probably the most stressful of your life, would you really want to know all of the negative possibilities you could end up facing? Sometimes I felt angry or discouraged when a Doctor shared something that was happening with S that I hadn't seen coming. But looking back I appreciate that they saved things for a need to know basis. One day at a time. It was much less overwhelming.

2. Chronic Lung Disease is not as scary as it sounds. When they first mentioned it as a possibility for my daughter, I think I about had a heart attack. "My daughter has what?!?!?" But all it means is that your baby requires oxygen after 36 weeks gestation (adjusted age). Yes, your baby will have scar tissue in his lungs for the rest of his life. But the wonderful news is that the body keeps growing new lung tissue until age 2, so much so that the scar tissue becomes a non-issue. Will my kid have asthma? Maybe (after all I had it as a kid even without being born prematurely). However the diagnosis of Chronic Lung is by no means going to hurt her for life. Phew! Would have loved that info before having the heart attack ;).

3. Share your expectations with the staff very clearly. I will never forget the day that I came into the hospital later than my normal time, only to find out that a nurse had given my daughter her first ever bottle, something I had been longing for and waiting to do for weeks. It about broke my heart. S had done really well with it, but the joy over that fact was completely overshadowed by my disappointment at missing it. When you have a baby (especially your first) with a prolonged stay in the NICU, it is very hard to feel like a mommy. And those precious moments really make a difference for your heart! If I could go back I would have clearly, loudly, and often communicated my desire to be present for all major milestones. Let them know! Better to come across as slightly obnoxious then to miss out on those memories.

About Breastmilk.....

4. If you plan to pump milk for your baby as long as possible, buy a pump! We have been renting the hospital grade pump for five months now. With all the money we've tossed at it, we should have just bought a double electric pump ourselves. Although I have filed an insurance claim, I have yet to hear anything, and I am wishing I had something to show for all the money spent. Bonus: if you buy your own pump you have one for the next baby!

5. Your milk supply might not last forever. I had no concept of this. So many times when my milk supply was great I decided to be lazy and not pump as much as I should have. Oh, how I wish I could go back and pump like a fiend to fill my deep freezer!! Because my supply has been very up and down, and to this day I am not sure how long S will be able to have a strictly breastmilk diet.

6. Don't buy bags for your milk! One, they are expensive. Two, the hospital will continue to supply you with the plastic containers for free as long as you need! Three, sometimes milk bags leak when defrosting, and precious milk is wasted. Another way I could have saved a ton of money if I had only known.

I hope that these tips are helpful to you in your NICU experience! It would have been very helpful for me at any rate :).

New Goals for a New Year

My husband turned 27 last month. The poor guy took it very seriously, not exactly sure that he wanted to be another year closer to 30. It was good though in that it inspired some reflection. Another year has gone by. What is it that we have accomplished? How are we doing on becoming the people that God would have us to be? There is nothing like a birthday, or the New Year for that matter, to get you to examine your priorities, the direction of your life, and where you would like to be another year down the road.

Reflection shouldn't lead to despair or disappointment over what you haven't done. Rather it should inspire you to start fresh on new goals with renewed energy. I love the start of new seasons; the school year, the New Year, etc. It fills me with delight! One more opportunity to try again. A new chance to grow in grace and improve. A blessing from the Lord that He certainly did not owe us.

For Niall and I, this time of reflection couldn't have been timed more perfectly. S is almost five months old, and has been home from the hospital for just about three. We are starting to adjust to our new life as parents. When there is a newborn in the house, schedules and goals are easily pushed to the peripheral. Early alarm clocks are silenced, the sleep you didn't get last night proving more desirable than time in the Word and prayer together.

Yet it is especially important that as parents we demonstrate discipline and good prioritization to our children. Sure, S isn't big enough to know what's going on now, but before we know it, she will be! And if we don't make the necessary changes early, it will be too late.

It has been a great blessing to make new goals as a team. For Niall to have the proper amount of time in the morning for his personal devotions, and then for us to have breakfast and a quick time of prayer and reading as a family, we need to get up at 5 am. The first week we tried it, we managed to succeed 3 days out of five. Week two was better, 4 days out of 5. Now we are on week three, aiming to get up at 5 all 5 days! And starting our day right together has been life-changing. We have noticed improvement in our communication, and closer personal walks with the Lord throughout our busy days. What a blessing!

So here's to another year :). What are your goals as the new year approaches?

Preserving NICU Memories

Although at the beginning of your NICU stay you may think you'll want to forget the entire thing ever happened, there will be things you do want to hang onto. Like just how tiny your little peanut was. And the moments in which you finally had that "AHA!" ray of light- "I AM a mother, and my baby knows me!" And how incredibly good the Lord was to you and your baby, the many ways He used His children to bless you. Yes, you will definitely want to remember these things! Here are some helpful ways that I've found to document my daughter's NICU stay:

-Photos. We took lots and lots of pictures! One of my favorite things we did was to take weekly shots of S next to a baby doll. . At first she and the doll were close to the same size. Now at nearly five months (two adjusted age) it fits right in her arms!

-Journaling. Within the week after my daughter's birth. my dear Pastor's wife gave me a beautiful journal that I felt was perfect for me and S. A lovely picture of a mother holding her daughter graced the cover. In it I began a journal to S, detailing the events surrounding her birth, and her time in the hospital. Since she has been home I've updated it from time to time with her milestones. I can't wait to give it to her someday :).

-Memento Box. Throughout S's hospital stay I collected various keepsakes; an xs preemie diaper, her stamped footprints from the day she was born, first hat, billy light goggles, and a tiny pacifier, among other things. Right now I just have them all in a wicker basket (as well as cards people gave us around the time of her birth), but someday soon I hope to get a pretty box to keep them in. I'll add her little preemie clothes too, and when she is a big girl and wants to know her story I will pull out the box and show her.

Because the truth is someday I will forget how tiny she really was, and I will want to see these things again and to remember the great faithfulness of the Lord, and just how precious my little girl was.

Goals for December

So.... November goals were a super big failure. I've been thinking about it, and here is where I went wrong:
1. Unrealistic expectations- Life is a lot different with a newborn! Failing at my three goals helped me to realize what I really can expect out of myself. Getting on the treadmill first thing every morning just might not be realistic right now.
2. Broad goals without a simple plan for accomplishing them- I said I wanted to walk on the treadmill every week morning, and pray every day, and blog three times a week, but I didn't make small goals to get there, and became overwhelmed. This month I will chart more specific, smaller to dos to make it more attainable.
3. No accountability- which has led me to decide that I should OFFICIALLY join the 3in30 challenge.     

What about December? Well, here goes....
 Goal #1: Exercise in some fashion more often. This is so vague! Haha. What I mean is it is good if I do anything; whether it is the treadmill, a walk around the neighborhood, or one of my yoga or pilates DVD's. And it is good even if it is only ten minutes. Because I have to ease myself back into this. And something is better than nothing!
Goal #2: Pray every day! This is still an essential, and I cannot relax on it. If I don't get on the treadmill in the morning (which is a great way to pray I've found), then I will pray during my first pumping session of the morning. I am shooting for at least 20 minutes. This is a minimal amount when we consider the importance of the discipline, really, but again, I have to start somewhere.
Goal #3: Play with baby S more often! It is so easy for her to be just along for the ride as I go about my daily activities. I want to purpose to spend more time focused just on her. To start with, I'm aiming for 15 minutes a day of "playtime." Let me know if you have any fun ideas of ways to play with your baby! I could use the insight.

We will see how December goes. By God's grace I will try to work harder!!! And become more disciplined. Because I have found the better my discipline in these areas, the more joyful life is :).