/**/ The Purposeful Wife: March 2012

Saturday, March 31, 2012

Purposeful Perusals, 8th Edition

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More Sinister Than The Hunger Games- A thoughtful post from a mom explaining how and why they allow their children to view and read some things and not others. Some of the things she doesn't allow might surprise you! Also she shares her sons views on the benefit of The Hunger Games, what an eloquent kid. "This is one of the reasons good Christian children walk away from their faith when they walk out the door to be on their own. They've never learned to think through a matter for themselves, digging in the Word and owning what they believe. They've never had to struggle with, "What do I believe and WHY?" because Mommy and Daddy have never been quiet long enough to force the child to do so. They've never been taught that the most dangerous worldviews are often wrapped in the prettiest, most alluring packages, sometimes with "Christian" pasted all over them and lovely horses running in the fields or people dancing on the rooftops."

5 Reasons Why You Should Take a Nap Everyday- by Michael Hyatt. And all the mamas said, "Amen."


Blog of the Week: Domestic Kingdom. Missionary wives sharing how to live the gospel in the "mundane." Their recommended reading list is particularly excellent!!!

Friday, March 30, 2012

Fridays with Fly Lady, Week #5

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 In case if you've missed earlier digests of my Fly Lady experiment, you can catch up here: week one, week two, week three and week four

I am almost finished with my 31 days of Fly Lady's Beginner Baby Steps. It has been a rewarding experience, leading to a smoother run home and a much shinier sink! Here's how this week went:

Day 23- Make a new page for your control journal entitled "afternoon routine." I do already have one, but this is not much to boast of as my morning routine doesn't get finished til past 2 each day! Baby steps, right?

Day 24- Add the "Swish and Swipe" to your morning routine. This is by far my FAVORITE aspect of Fly Lady's system- every morning when you're done getting ready for the day, you quickly wipe down any spots on your mirror, your bathroom counter and sink, and "swish" your toilet bowl. Voila! Your bathroom is company ready at all times :). I haven't been faithful in this every day, but I am working on it and not giving up. Because I don't know about you, but my bathroom definitely needs it!

Day 25- Read Fly Lady's Personal Testimonial. I did and was encouraged! Little steps towards small good habits can make a big difference in the long run.

Day 26- A reminder that it takes one month to start a new habit, and not to be discouraged. Thank you for days of grace, Fly Lady :).

Day 27- Think about what's for dinner EARLY in the day. Usually I am pretty good about this... how funny that on the day I was supposed to do this, I didn't look at my baby step for the day until 5:10 pm? And that I still hadn't decided what to make! Ouch. Okay, speaking of what's for dinner....

One more week to go, more or less, with only four days of baby steps to go. I'm still working at cementing my routines! Far from perfect, but Fly Lady doesn't like that word anyway ;).

As for my other two 3in30 goals for March, reading six books has not been quite attained too (still have over half way to go with two, and haven't even started one of them), but my kitchen has been successfully decluttered and organized! I'm still debating goals for April, and not sure if I'll keep going with the ambitious six books a month. I'll let you know!

How are your goals coming? And how is your home looking?




Thursday, March 29, 2012

Things You Learn To Do One-Handed as a Mom

Since becoming a mother I've noticed new abilities in myself for multitasking. As women we are known for multitasking anyway, but being a mom can take this talent to a whole new level! For example, having to bounce a crying baby or balance a bottle for a hungry one while continuing whatever else it is you are trying to get done.

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Here are some funny things I've found myself doing single handedly:

  • Typing (bonus points for hitting control+alt+delete, it takes mad skills!)
  • Going to the bathroom (gross I know, but I'm sure I'm not the only one :) )
  • Stirring whatever is on the stove top
  • Measuring ingredients for whatever you are baking
  • Picking up the house
  • Making the bed
  • Eating (a hot meal? what is that?)
  • Starting a load of laundry
  • Setting the table
  • Putting away clean dishes
  • Talking on the phone (a given I suppose!)
  • Starting a loaf of bread in the bread machine
  • Putting away folded laundry

The things I haven't managed yet (or have been to afraid to try!) include but are not limited to ironing, pulling things out of the oven, folding laundry, and showering :). When these tasks are necessary I hope and pray that the swing or bouncy seat will pacify the babe.

I guess if I just wore my baby in the baby wrap more often I could make my own life quite a bit easier :).

How about you- what things do you amuse yourself with by doing one-handed? 

*Warning: I am NOT a proponent for trying to hold your baby while ironing or taking things out of the oven... or showering for that matter! Please be safe, and disregard my silliness!*

Wednesday, March 28, 2012

We Live By Faith {Not Feelings}


"but the righteous shall live by his faith." Habakuk 2:4 b

We are called to live by faith, not feelings. In obedience to do that which we know to be right. 
To get out of bed when the alarm goes off, even though we feel like staying under the covers. 

To force ourselves to exercise and get our body moving, even though we feel like loafing on the couch.

To shower and dress, though our sweat pants feel so comfortable.

To faithfully serve our families, keeping a clean home and meals cooked, even though we might prefer reading a book, watching a movie, surfing the web....

To live by faith, not by feelings. 

On rainy days, I find this particularly challenging. Or when I'm tired because the baby was fussy and kept me up late. Or when my hormones are making me feel totally deranged. 

Our feelings are funny things, always changing, depending on our circumstances, our physical condition, the amount of rest we have or have not gotten. If we lived by feelings, we would accomplish very little for the kingdom.

Be encouraged: "And let us not grow weary of doing good, for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up." Galatians 6:9

May God give you grace to serve Him with renewed spirits and fresh energy today! To live by faith, purposing to take dominion over fleeting feelings! 


Tuesday, March 27, 2012

The Hunger Games: Christians and Culture

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Last weekend The Hunger Games hit the theaters, and I have been amused by the different articles I've seen about it online. Articles written by Christians. Have you noticed that every time a new pop-culture phenomenon comes around, everyone in the Christian community has something to say about it? The Matrix, Harry Potter, Twilight, etc. From strong censures to radical "spiritualizations" of the material, a swinging pendulum of opinions can be found wherever you look.

In light of my strong belief that art communicates, I thought it could be productive to take a look at a few examples of this that I found. For your reading and thinking pleasure, here is a little panorama of what's out there...

Christians and The Hunger Games- Strong Censure. I truly appreciated this author's perspective; he is gracious, a good writer, and trying to be Biblical. And while I could see his point (The Hunger Games are an elaborate set-up for situational ethics), I believe that a Christian reader can enjoy the story and be discerning, seeing Katniss not as a life role-model, but as a fallen sinner with many flaws. While reading the books I did not think, "Hmm... if I was in the Hunger Games, how would I kill my way to the top?" No, as Christians, if we were in a Hunger Games sort of situation, obviously we would obey God rather than man, and not kill. Ultimately I didn't agree with Douglas Wilson, but I think his review is worth the read because it will help you to be more aware of the subtle messages authors (and filmmakers) convey through their work.

Let The Hunger Games Begin- Over-Spiritualizing. As I read the first paragraph of Relevant Magazine's review, I was totally sucked in. The second paragraph had me even more hooked with its analysis of our current culture and its connection to The Hunger Games story. But when it turned into everyone's "hunger" for community, and then faith, it completely lost me. The author's closing statement that The Hunger Games "brings to mind the call to 'act justly, love mercy, and walk humbly with your God,'" was a super-stretch for me. Really??? How did they come to this conclusion??? Because I didn't see this at all in the books.

The Hunger Games- Middle Ground. Christianity Today's review deals directly with the movie, not just the story. I found this to be much more thoughtful and accurate in its understanding of the story than the other two reviews. They boil the plot down to "loss of innocence" and are careful to build their case from the storyline. "Like many good sci-fi fables, Hunger Games says a lot about us: our voyeuristic culture, the tempering distraction of mindless entertainment, the balance of compassion and self-preservation, the interconnectivity of the haves and have-nots, hope and fear as controlling agents, and children's loss of innocence." Worth your reading!

These articles should give you a little flavor of the different ideas that can be drawn from one simple book (or movie). What I am trying to advocate for is discerning, careful reading that doesn't jump to extreme or irrelevant conclusions. It is so important for Christians to think carefully through issues presented in written and cinematic works; instead of 1) mindlessly absorbing them, or 2) quickly writing them off without taking the time to understand them.

Still anxious to see the movie as I haven't been able to escape the house long enough yet :).

Did you see the movie or read the books? What do you think the author was trying to communicate? How should we respond as Christians to the messages going forth in pop-culture? I'd love to hear your thoughts!

(And in case you missed it, my review of the Trilogy can be read here.)



Saturday, March 24, 2012

Purposeful Perusals, 7th Edition

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 Infant Routines in Our Home- Lindsay of Passionate Homemaking gives us a peek into her home- how she has found balance and what works best for her (scheduled vs. attachment parenting). I appreciated her open-minded approach, this is an area of Christian liberty, not "thus saith the Lord." Good stuff!

"I'm Fat" and other things my daughter has heard me say- A reminder from Sarah Mae that little ears are listening to the careless words we say, and those words can have a profound impact. 

Happy weekend! What good things have you found online this week?



Friday, March 23, 2012

Fridays with Fly Lady, Week #4

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 And another week with Fly Lady has flown by! :) The thing I am loving about these Baby Steps
 is that the days where you add a new habit are cushioned by "easy" days on either side. For example, on one day you might start doing a load of laundry a day, but the next day will just be reading something that Fly Lady wrote. The slow pace is perfect, it makes this so much more manageable.

Day 17- Pick a specific, reasonable bed time, add it to your evening routine, and stick to it. We are early risers in our home, so my husband aims for bed between 8-9 each night. I'm usually stuck up later with the babe... I set my bedtime as nine, and have been doing everything in my power to be ready for bed then. But if baby decides nine isn't working for her on a particular night, I'm stuck. So again, I'm just doing what I can (teeth brushed, evening routine accomplished, etc.) to be ready in the blessed event that she cooperates :).

Day 18- Read Fly Lady's 11 Commandments. Pretty good commandments for the most part :). Number four was definitely the most pertinent for me!!!

Day 19-Read this testimonial from Sink Reflections.

Day 20-Include laundry in your morning and evening routines. Although I hadn't planned on doing laundry this day, I got together a small load and made sure to finish it (folded and put away!) by the end of the day. Because it is so nice to be completely caught up on laundry :).

Day 21-Read this week's Ask Fly Lady question. Easy enough! :)

Day 22- Work on your control journal.

Due to a couple of unexpected late nights this week with random friends popping over, the evening routine (shining sink, laying out the next days clothes, putting out my hot spot) has been pitched in favor of bed more frequently then I would like to admit. There's always tonight, right?

My other 3in30 goals for March: 

-Organize and purge my kitchen. On track! With spending 15 minutes a day deep cleaning next week, it should be well in hand.

-Read six books. So far this month I've read The Hunger Games Trilogy, Lies Women Believe, and am slowly progressing through Respectable Sins, Super Baby Food, and The Horse and His Boy. Have yet to pick up Night. We'll see how that goes! *Click on book title for my review*

How are you doing on goal progression this month?


Thursday, March 22, 2012

Augustine on Breastfeeding

Feeding S a bottle of breastmilk during her NICU days

 "I know not whence I came, only that your merciful sustenance kept me alive when I did... It was your sustenance I drew from fleshly milk, since neither my mother nor nurses were filling their own breasts with it. You yourself dispensed this baby food through them, following the pattern, the gracious providence, you have embedded deep in nature. You provided that I should wish for no more than was supplied, and that those supplying it should wish to give me what you gave them. The wish to supply me came from the natural instinct you planted deep in them, so that doing me good did them good, a good they did not provide themselves but passed on from you, the source of all good, my God, my rescue at every stage." -Augustine, Confessions, In-Fans (Speechless)

When's the last time you praised God for feeding and sustaining your baby? Beautiful, said as only Augustine could say it.

Wednesday, March 21, 2012

Book Review: Lies Women Believe

"Sadly, most people- even Christians- have unthinkingly exposed themselves to so much deception that they do not even realize they are being deceived. That is the very nature of deception- it blinds us to the fact that we have been deceived."

 We live in a world that is constantly bombarding us with lies. Lies about ourselves ("I can't help the way I am," "My worth lies in my appearance and accomplishments"), lies about God ("God is not really enough," "God won't hold me accountable for my sin"), lies about our family ("I will be miserable if I submit to my husband") and lies about our emotions ("I can't control my emotions"). Many times we are so entrenched in erroneous worldviews that we don't even realize the power they wield over us.

In her direct, no-nonsense style, Nancy Leigh DeMoss gives us a loud and clear wake-up call. She exposes the lies we are inclined towards as Christian women, and replaces these lies with the Truth of God that we so desperately need. With plenty of testimonies from other women's experiences, and humble confessions of Nancy's own tendencies to believe lies, this text is real and palpable and helpful.

Included are 40 common lies dealing with ourselves, God, sin, priorities, marriage, children, emotions and circumstances. Although I did not agree with every one of the author's conclusions, I will say that Scripture is central to her book, and it was a very good read. I couldn't recommend it enough.

What lies have shaped you? How has the Truth set you free?



Monday, March 19, 2012

That the Works of God Might be Displayed


Yesterday morning as I was completing my Bible Reading Plan for the day, I was struck by Luke 9:1-3.

"As He passed by, He saw a man blind from birth. And His disciples asked Him, 'Rabbi, who sinned, this man or his parents, that he was born blind?'
Jesus answered, 'It was not that this man sinned, or his parents, but that the works of God might be displayed in him."

How quick we are to forget in the painful times that God has a purpose in all things. Even when a baby is born blind... or three months early... or with other significant setbacks.

God has a purpose in everything, and that purpose is that His works might be displayed and His name glorified. Pain is not always punishment, it is never an accident, and it is always for the good of those who love God and are called according to His purpose (Romans 8:28).

So I must ask, are you willing to joyfully suffer, that the works of God might be displayed in you? Then the harder question- are you willing to watch your children suffer, that the works of God might be displayed in them?

Oh, how we love our babies. We want the very best for them. I remember watching S in the incubator, when she was still so tiny, wondering and worrying what the permanent side effects of her prematurity might be.

As I considered the painful list of possibilities, my heart ached to take them for her. Oh, that they could be my pains to bear, and not hers! If I could take them on me, and she could walk away unscathed...

It doesn't work that way. Pain and brokenness will reach our children in this fallen, sin cursed world. Do we trust the One who afflicts them? Can we run to Him and rest in Him, trusting Him even when He decrees that they suffer?

Is our greatest desire for God to be glorified? Will we willingly lay down our cherished dreams of blissful, happy lives for our children, in order that His name be praised through their burdens and griefs?

If I am truly honest, this is painfully difficult for me. This is the key hurdle for the Christian parent; to love Christ more. To not treasure our children as idols, to count the cost of true discipleship. And I must confess that I fall short.

Oh Lord, give us this faith. The faith to leave our babies in your hands, to love You the most, and to exhibit joyful, peaceful trust in You even when you ordain that they suffer.

That the works of God might be displayed in them. 

Linked with Mommy Monday and The Better Mom.

Saturday, March 17, 2012

Purposeful Perusals, 6th Edition

Happy St. Patrick's Day!


And here are some good reads for your enjoyment this weekend :). 

An End to Your Work Day- Jessalyn Hutto at Desiring Virtue encourages us stay at home mama's to plan our days so that at the end we can relax with our family. Excellent advice! 

Quit Taking Credit for this Mess- Trina Holden exposes our tendency to blame ourselves for circumstances beyond our control in a fallen world. Refreshing.

This is what St. Patrick's Day is Really About- Muthering Heights discusses the real St. Patrick. Good stuff we all should know :).

What links did you enjoy this week? Please share in the comments! Thanks to DAC last week I learned about two new fascinating websites. I'd love to hear what interests you!

Friday, March 16, 2012

Fridays with Fly Lady, Week #3

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 *Here is Week #1 and Week #2, in case if you missed them*

My third week with Fly Lady is finished, and so far this experiment is going quite well. I am not following every instruction to a tee, but I'm trying to break down the theories behind her system into a system that works well for me in my current life phase.

For example, much of what Fly Lady advises is run by a timer- 2 minutes putting out a hot spot, 5 minutes on a room rescue. My 2 minute hot spot each night involves putting items away, un-timed and one-handed, while bouncing a fussy baby. My version of a five minute room rescue is what I call "tidy up" on my morning routine- I go around the house, make my bed, pick up stray items, and tidy whatever is untidy. This takes about five minutes, and it works for me.

I have not shined my sink every night *gasp!*, but because I am doing it far more frequently than ever before, it still looks pretty good most of the time. Do what works for your home and fits your needs! No system will last, no matter how clever, if you don't make it your own. Here was my week of baby beginner steps:

Day 11- Spend 15 minutes writing down your "inspirational" phrases on a page in your control journal. I didn't spend 15 minutes, but I did jot down some of the verses that help to motivate me in homemaking, and a favorite word of encouragement, "Something is better than nothing." Said sheet is in my binder!

Day 12- Delete all of Fly Lady's messages from your inbox. I beat her to the punch. As you know if you've been following my Fly Lady journey, I found the 15-20 e-mails a day a little too spammish. I unsubscribed after day three. Oops.

Day 13- Choose one of Kelly's missions for the day and do it. I love Kelly's missions! The first day it was to shine your bathroom sink and wipe down all of your bathroom counters; done in 5 minutes. I did them several days throughout the week, even though it wasn't technically "required" in the baby beginner steps, just because they were easy, made my home a smidge cleaner, and helped me to feel more accomplished :).

Day 14- Read Kelly's essay on using a calendar. This was a two minute task, and I was pleased to have finished my Fly Lady task so early in the day :).

Day 15- Add making bed to your morning routine. This is technically a part of my morning routine already. I must confess I don't make it immediately upon rising, usually baby is still sleeping in her crib at the foot of our bed, so the less noise I make the better. Also many mornings I sneak back into bed with S for her morning nap :). Hey, a mommas gotta do what a mommas gotta do ;).

Day 16- Pick an e-mail from Fly Lady and read it. Since I unsubscribed quite awhile ago, I've been checking daily flight plans and other relevant information on the launch pad.

And here are my other two 3in30 goals for March:

1. Read six books- I've been sidetracked from the six that I had planned on reading, but I am making good progress in three of them, and I did read all three of The Hunger Games Trilogy (read my thoughts on them here). What do you think- can I count that as successful?

2. Purge and organize my kitchen, 15 minutes each week day. I have only spent the 15 minutes about every other day, oops. But the kitchen itself is going well. Most of the organization and purging work is done, so I need to turn my attention to a deep clean next I think. That's what I love about focusing on one room a month, it is so manageable, so if I don't work on it every single day, it still gets done by the end.

Have you been "flying" with me? How do you like it? How are your other goals for the month going?

Thursday, March 15, 2012

A Literary Analysis: The Hunger Games

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*Warning: Spoiler Alert! If you have not read all three books of The Hunger Games Trilogy, you might want to wait to read this review*

In the not-so-far-away future, what once was North America is now Panem- a country of 12 districts, ruled by a single city, the Capitol. Seventy-four years ago the districts rebelled against the Capitol and were defeated. As punishment and an ever present reminder of the Capitol's total domination, each year one boy and one girl between the ages of 12 and 18 is randomly selected from each district, and sent to compete in the Hunger Games. The Game is a fight to the death, televised in a giant Romanesque arena.

The Trilogy, covering the experience of 16 year old Katniss Everdeen, explores a plethora of issues. Poverty, hunger, oppression and violence- and the effects they wreck on youth. What is unsettling to the reader is the eery familiarity of it all; Suzanne Collins writes of a time not far from ours, in a voice that sounds like ours, of the place that we call home.

Interspersed with the modern America feel are throwbacks to the ancient Roman empire. Prominent characters from the Capitol are named Caesar, Flavius, Octavia and Portia. Much like their Roman counterparts; Capitol citizens worship their bellies as god, idolize fashion, and pursue pleasure as the highest good, even and especially at the expense of others.The Hunger Games themselves are a horrifying combination of reality television and the Roman Colosseum.

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 Why such a bizarre combination? Further thought leads one to the realization; Rome allowed gluttony and idle pleasure to sway it from political and moral responsibility, leading to the collapse of its rule. The Capitol heads down the same road and is also sacked. Suzanne Collins fuses the decadent and self-absorbed cultures of ancient Rome and modern day America as a warning for society today; any nation that neglects its civil and moral responsibilities in reckless pursuit of pleasure is doomed for destruction.


The Capitol's tight-fisted rule has created a stark contrast between its own citizens and the people of the districts. While the Capitol feasts extravagantly, the Districts are starving. The Districts work back breaking jobs for long hours to support the Capitol's unceasing recreation. The Capitol delights in the Hunger Games, the Districts dread them. Capitol citizens undergo drastic alterations to become more "beautiful," much like the American obsession with appearance and plastic surgery, but their unnatural finery is strange and alienating to the plain, ordinary district folk.

Katniss observes the idleness and frivolity in her days of preparation for the Games: "What do they do all day, these people in the Capitol, besides decorating their bodies and waiting around for a new shipment of tributes to roll in and die for their entertainment?...The whole rotten lot of them is despicable." Again the reader is reminded of Rome and its affluent citizens, with full bellies and extravagant wardrobes, finding entertainment in the arena deaths of gladiators, slaves, and prisoners.

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While Americans may not enjoy actual murder as entertainment; one must think of the violence in television, video games, and movies. We may not kill 23 children annually for a thrilling show, but we've murdered millions through abortion (the American holocaust of the unborn has far outnumbered Hitler's death count). Consider our obsession with fashion and frivolous amusement, and our lack of concern for weightier matters. In the words of Neil Postman, we are Amusing Ourselves to Death.

This obsession with self and personal pleasure leads to a total disregard for others. As Katniss notes of her stylists after she escapes the arena, "It's funny, because even though they're rattling on about the Games, it's all about where they were or what they were doing or how they felt when a specific event occurred... Everything is about them, not the dying boys and girls in the arena." As the tale unfolds, it is the careless trampling of the District people that leads to another rebellion, this time ultimately collapsing the Capitol.

If there are any doubts to Suzanne Collins deeper meaning, they will be silenced in the third book of the trilogy, Mockingjay. Plutarch, a Capitol figure heavily involved in the District's revolution, explains the Capitol's predicament to Katniss: "in the Capitol, all they've known is Panem et Circenses...It's a saying from thousands of years ago, written in a language called Latin about a place called Rome...Panem et Circenses translates into 'Bread and Circuses.' The writer was saying that in return for full bellies and entertainment, his people had given up their political responsibilities and therefore their power."

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Ms. Collins has drawn a definite connection between Panem, the country ruled by the Capitol, and Rome. The Capitol's defeat becomes identical to Rome's defeat. What does this have to do with us? If you cannot see the remarkable similarities between the Capitol and America today in regards to a careless disregard for life, an all consuming passion for pleasure, an obsession with physical appearance, and a lack of fiscal, political, or moral responsibility, allow Katniss' more direct indictment to convince you.

"Frankly, our ancestors don't seem much to brag about. I mean, look at the state they left us in, with the wars and the broken planet. Clearly, they didn't care about what would happen to the people who came after them." Who are these ancestors? Remember, Panem is North America in the near future. We are the ancestors. 

Will we hear Katniss' indictment? Is America too far gone in its quest of amusing itself to death? We would do well to heed The Hunger Games' warning: if we neglect our moral and political obligations in our passion for diversions, we are headed for the same fate as Rome and the Capitol. A sobering thought.

The only thing about The Hunger Games trilogy that disappointed me was the Twilight-esque love triangle. However, unlike the Twilight series, The Hunger Games is rich with meaning and purpose, as this post has hopefully convinced you. I'll have to go along with Stephen King on this one, for unfortunately, "the love triangle is standard for the genre (of adolescent lit.)."

Have you read The Hunger Games yet? What were your thought? Do you think my assessment is accurate?

*Thank you Mary Beth for loaning me the Kindle version of the trilogy! I appreciate it! Hopefully you find time to enjoy them soon :)*

Wednesday, March 14, 2012

Because Art Communicates

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 Reading The Hunger Games brought me back to my college days- an eager English student, devouring novels and digging their depths to decipher what the author was saying, then compiling my answers into literary analyses. This text is so rich, so ripe with meaning, that I've been mentally stuck on it ever since I picked it up.

I debated whether this blog was the place for my thoughts. Blog posts should be short and to the point; few read them for deeper educational purposes. Beyond that, my blog genre is more along the line of Christian homemaking, marriage and motherhood. How would an in depth look at The Hunger Games fit underneath that label?

 But as I mulled it over, I came to a conclusion: the average reader of novels does not realize that what they are reading is bombarding them with subtle messages and worldviews. We read novels for pleasure, for the sheer delight of the story.

There is nothing wrong with this, the reason I enjoyed these books so much is because they made an excellent and compelling story. But if in your entertainment you do not realize that the words make more than a story, you are in great danger of being pulled whatever direction the author wants you to be.

All art seeks to communicate- visual, cinematic, theatrical, musical, rhetorical, etc.  Whether you are watching Sesame Street with your child or a new blockbuster with your husband, listening to the radio, viewing portraits at a gallery, or going to a play; there is a message being conveyed to you. Sometimes its simple and harmless, sometimes it is wholesome...and sometimes dangerous.

Your greatest danger, however, is being unaware. The greatest disservice you can do yourself is to check out mentally and just allow yourself to be mindlessly entertained. Because when you are taking ideas in unawares, you open yourself up to being persuaded by worldviews contrary to the Word of God; feminism, materialism, moral relativism, etc.

As parents especially, we need to be discerning about what we put before our children's forming minds. A steady diet of mainstream children's television and movies will easily fill your child's head with the notions that rebellion is healthy, parents are stupid, and there is no such thing as a moral absolute. I could write an entire post on this topic alone, but for today I'll leave it at this: it is even more important for parents to be critical thinkers when it comes to the arts and entertainment, as they are responsible for training their children as well as themselves.

It is essential for us to be purposeful and intentional in our reading, to engage mentally and to be discerning. In hopes of encouraging others towards this aim, tomorrow I will be sharing my analysis of The Hunger Games Trilogy. Nothing too academic, I promise. Just what I've been mentally digesting of late, and an example of how I attempt to think through what authors and artists are truly conveying.

Do you agree that all art communicates? Why or why not?

Tuesday, March 13, 2012

What You Can Do: Caring for your Baby in the NICU

Your baby came too early. Now you are trying to recover, possibly in a drug-induced haze, agonizing over her condition, standing helpless by her bedside. One of the most difficult experiences in the life of a parent is too watch your child suffer, and not be able to do anything about it.

If this is where you're at today, I've been there too. Take heart friend- there are ways that you can help and care for your baby, long before he is able to snuggle in your arms. Here are a few ideas:

1. Be there. Even though you can't hold him, and may feel useless, your presence is of utmost importance. Your baby recognizes your voice from the womb, and hearing you with him will be reassuring in his new scary world. Your presence also communicates your level of concern with the staff, they will know that you care and will seek to better equip and inform you in your NICU journey. It will be vital to your comfort and peace of mind to know as many of your baby's caregivers as well as possible. Lastly, the best way to become as knowledgeable as you can is to be present, asking questions and observing the doctors and nurses.

2. Get on your knees. Run to the LORD for healing and comfort, seek the face of the God who formed your precious baby in your womb and still is holding her in His hands. He knows, He cares, He is at work here. You will have the unique privilege of watching your baby's development week by week, a process normally hidden from human eye. You will see His miracle of life at work in a way that many will never see. Seek Him for grace and strength, find grace in the everlasting arms. In Him you will find the power and grace that you need to walk through this difficult journey.

3. Get rest. While it is important to be there, it is equally urgent to get good rest. You cannot help your baby when you are battling exhaustion and a weakened body; these factors will only add stress and weigh you down. Go home, get some sleep, eat good food. Take care of yourself physically, emotionally, and spiritually.

4. Pump breastmilk. Breastfed preemies flourish on a much higher level then formula fed. When your baby has breastmilk, his chances of developing the dreaded NEC infection are much lower. Your milk will keep his G.I tract healthy, aid in quicker development, and provide him with much needed immunities. Seek out a lactation consultant for help here, if your hospital does not provide one, La Leche League can help you to find one in your area (or at least provide you with some much needed information!). If your milk doesn't come in as quickly as you're told it should, do not stress out! This was a high stress area for me in the first few days of S' life. The sooner you relax, the better off your supply will be. Just follow the advice of your lactation consultant, and try to find a back-up plan if possible. If you really are unable to pump, ask your NICU staff about donor milk. The head doctor of our NICU ordered several ounces from a milk bank just in case, which helped me to relax and did increase my supply.

5. Read up. One of the best things I did in those early days was to purchase a couple of books on prematurity. I found Dr. Sear's The Premature Baby Book and Dr. Jen Gunter's The Preemie Primer to be especially beneficial. As I learned the medical jargon, what it really means, and what we were potentially going to be dealing with, I felt empowered and better prepared to advocate for my daughter.



6. Touch. Depending on how early your baby came, and how stable their condition is, you might not be able to touch or hold them for a long time. Ask the nurses about how you can safely touch your baby. With S, we were told to place a hand on her head and one on her feet and legs (no rubbing or patting as this irritates their fragile skin!) to comfort her, because it made her feel snug and secure like she would have been in my belly. At five days old I was able to kangaroo with her, which was a very healing experience for both of us. If you're unable to kangaroo for weeks or even longer, read about it, tell the doctors that you want to do it as soon as your baby is physically ready, and prepare by bringing a button down shirt to the hospital. When S was several weeks old, one of the Neonatologists really encouraged me by praising her extreme alertness. She explained that this was due to all of the touch and special care S had received from me. Let me tell you, that was a happy day for me in the NICU!

7. Express your desire to be involved, ask what you can do! Most nurses will teach you how to change your baby's diaper, give them a bath, take their temperature. Tell them that you want to do everything that you are allowed to do. They should be very happy to assist you in this way!

Holding S for the first time, while a nurse changed her bedding. 4 days old.
Ultimately you are essential to your baby. You may worry that your baby doesn't know you, that they will know their nurses better than their mother; I did. These feelings can be devastating. Rest assured, your baby does know you the best and need you the most! The first time I kangarood with S, her oxygen saturation was excellent, and she cried when they pulled her off of me at the end. It was the first time I felt like her mom; she wanted to stay with me. It was a truly precious moment. At 7 months old one of our favorite NICU nurses came to visit S- S started bawling and looking for mommy the second I handed her to the nurse. You may not feel like the mom right now, but someday soon you will. Never question this!

Do what you can do. At the end of the day, refuse to beat yourself up for what you didn't or couldn't do. Cherish whatever time you are given with your baby. And be sure to thank God for His mercies which are new every morning!

Monday, March 12, 2012

Make Your Own Taco Seasoning

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 Before college, I did not know that you could buy pre-mixed packages of taco seasoning. When I first learned this, I thought people must be crazy! Buy a little overpriced packet when you already have every needed ingredient in your kitchen? No thank you!

To contrast, my husband Niall grew up in Ireland and didn't have homemade tacos until he came to the states in his teenage years. Every time he had tacos, they were made with the store bought mix, so he didn't know that there was any other option. Until he married me :). 

My mother's taco meat is delicious, and so today I am sharing her very simple recipe with you. Niall heartily approves it, and I promise that you already have every necessary ingredient in your kitchen.

Measurements are figured for 1-1.5 lbs. of ground beef.

Chop half of an onion, mince 1 or 2 cloves of garlic, and brown with hamburger meat (if you don't have these on hand, you can add 1 tsp. onion powder and a touch of garlic powder with the other seasonings at the end). When meat is browned, drain grease.

Add 3/4 cup water to your meat. Season with 2 tablespoons chili powder, 1 tsp. salt, and 1/2 tsp. of cumin. Simmer and stir until most of the water is cooked off.

Serve with taco shells and your favorite accompaniments. Sometimes I make a triple batch, and freeze small portions in ziploc bags. Then I can thaw one for a quick meal, or a tasty snack of nachos. Have lots of leftovers? Another brilliant idea from my mom: add leftover taco meat to a prepared box of macaroni and cheese. Maybe not very healthy, but it sure is tasty :). 

Do you make your own taco seasoning? Is your recipe similar to mine? How does it vary? Please share!

Saturday, March 10, 2012

Purposeful Perusals, 5th Edition

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 Do Babies Have to Cost a Lot?- The Birth Bug examines the cost of children, and encourages those who would like to start a family, but are struggling with the elusive hurdle of "financial stability." A good and realistic, frugal approach.

Overcome Your Entertainment Addiction- Joel McDurman asserts that dominion, not pietism, is the cure for those of us with entertainment addictions. His approach is balanced and sensible, and yet again I was convicted by my love for worldly entertainment.

I Just Want to *Be*- Jessica of Muthering Heights expresses her desire and struggle with just being herself in the whizzing world of social media. A very good read.

Have a wonderful weekend :). Have you read anything good online in the past week? Please share in the comments!

Friday, March 9, 2012

Friday's with Fly Lady, Week #2

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I must confess I slacked off last weekend, not completing the day's Fly Lady challenge on either Friday or Saturday (and of course Sunday is the day I take off from it anyway). My goal is to take as long as I need to complete each day, giving myself plenty of grace. Because forming new routines and developing habits is a process, and takes time. Here's what I've been up to:

Day 6- Spend two minutes putting out your hot spot. I took two minutes right before bed to clean up the pile collecting on our counter top. The night's that I do work on my hot spot make a huge difference! The pile is almost gone, and oh the clarity it brings to me, emotionally, mentally and physically. It's so much easier to breathe deeply and feel energized in a pile-free home!

Day 7- Pick out your clothes for the next day. I must confess I've only done that once this week :). But it did help me to get dressed earlier in the day!!

Day 8- Find a binder and write your morning and evening routines into it. I'm one step ahead of Fly Lady as I already have a binder with my To Do lists and Routines in it. I've written each baby beginner step into my routines as I go through them day by day. So far, in the morning we are: getting dressed to the earrings (if you don't understand, check week #1), checking our written reminders for the day, reading Fly Lady's messages for the day, focusing on our Biblical purpose for a tidy home, and apparently putting out our hot spot (oops, I've only been doing it at night). In the evening we: shine our sink (love the shiny sink!!), put out the next day's clothes, and put out a hot spot for two minutes.

Day 9- Add a five minute room rescue to your morning routine. Basically, take five minutes to focus on one room. What's worked for me for ages is what I call "Tidy Up." This has been on my morning routine for awhile, though sometimes it isn't done until early afternoon. I run around my house, making the bed, picking up the random things that have been left out, wiping down surfaces, maybe sweeping up crumbs. Whatever the most obvious things that are making the house look messy, I deal with. This is my secret to a semi-tidy home. Okay, maybe I'm not following Fly Lady to a tee, but I'm all about figuring out what works best for you in your home. Do what works! Or nothing will be done :).

Day 10- Spend 15 minutes picking up trash around your home, then 15 minutes putting your feet up and relaxing. Again, I'm varying on this just a tad. One of my March goals for 3in30 is to spend 15 minutes each week day organizing and de-cluttering my kitchen, so I count this instead. I've been doing pretty good on this so far, only missed one day.

The only other 3in30 goal I have yet to mention is reading six books. I have not completed a single book on my list, but I did get distracted and read the entire Hunger Games Trilogy this week :). So interesting! Look for my thoughts on it next week. And I have begun several of the other books for March.

That's how my adventure with Fly Lady is going. Have you been going through the Beginner Baby Steps too? What has been the most helpful? If not, how are your other March goals coming?




Wednesday, March 7, 2012

On Time and The Five-Minute Solution

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"Dost thou love life? Then do not squander time, for that's the stuff life is made of." -Benjamin Franklin

Five minutes into The Five Minute Solution by Mary Frances Budzik, I realized that this book was not worth the time it would take for me to read it's entirety. This Benjamin Franklin quote is the only redeemable thing I found in the few minutes spent.

This book is full of random trivia and quotations, and silly ideas for spending your waiting moments, such as scatting to the elevator music you listen to on hold. If learning the NATO phonetic alphabet, or making a Tangram, or fine tuning your chopstick skills, is of great interest to you, and if you actually have a moment to do these things, you might enjoy this book.


But if you are like me, and find yourself feeding your baby or wiping crumbs off the counter or changing a diaper while on hold, you might want to spend your reading time on something of greater significance. This was a hard decision to make, because I am a stickler about finishing any book I've started. Fear not! I will still attempt six books this month.

I've discovered The Hunger Games, and am currently in book two. So very interesting! Keep your eye out for my upcoming review. This is the most thought-provoking thing I've read in awhile. I was totally turned off by the concept, but when urged by reliable sources, gave in. It has immensely exceeded all of my expectations!!!

What have you been reading lately?

Monday, March 5, 2012

Book Review: Knowing God


"Not many of us, I think, would ever naturally say that we have known God. The words imply a definiteness and matter-of-factness of experience to which most of us, if we are honest, have to admit that we are still strangers. We claim, perhaps, to have a testimony, and can rattle off our conversion story with the best of them; we say that we know God- this, after all, is what evangelicals are expected to say; but would it occur to us to say, without hesitation, and with reference to particular events in our personal history, that we have known God? I doubt it, for I suspect that with most of us experience of God has never become so vivid as that." Knowing God, 24-25

So begins the second chapter of J.I. Packer's classic work, Knowing God. Knowing God is a biblical study of the character of God; who He is, what He is doing, and how He works in the world and the individual lives of His people. It is Scripturally rich and accurate, and will expand any readers understanding of the God they claim to know.

Packer's questions for the reader throughout the work are piercing. Do you really know God? Are you worshiping God as He is presented in the Bible, or are you worshiping a god of your own imagination? If you know the LORD, why is your heart cold and your life unchanged? I was painfully convicted the further I read, yet to my own shame, not as convicted or grieved as I ought to have been.

This is a book that I will be referring to again and again. It requires thoughtful, slow, and deep drinking in. I couldn't urge you zealously enough to seek it out and study. Loaded with Scripture, it is the perfect tool for personal Bible study. If my recommendation isn't enough to convince you, it also comes highly commended by Elisabeth Elliot, R.C Sproul, Billy Graham, Michael Card, Joni Erickson Tada, Chuck Swindoll, and countless others.

"This is eternal life: that they may know you, the only true God, and Jesus Christ, whom you have sent."
John 17:3

Friday, March 2, 2012

Friday's With Fly Lady, Week #1

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  For those of you who missed yesterday's post on my goals for March, one of them is to go through Fly Lady's baby beginner steps. In her beginner steps she helps you to slowly build workable cleaning and good living habits into your days. Lately I have been craving routine and order, and I've wanted to do this forever, so March seemed like the perfect month! Here was how my first week went (technically I started in February, since I will be observing Sunday's as the Lord's Day and a day of rest and worship, I'm going to need the extra days to make it up).

Day 1- I shined my sink. Due to a lack of bleach, I first scrubbed it down with antibacterial dish soap, then baking soda, and finally finished with a Windex shining :). I took extra care to use a straight edge and get in the little cracks and crevices. It turned out very pretty and sparkly :)!


Day 2- I dressed to the... earrings? Fly Lady says to dress to the shoes, to make yourself feel ready to go and professional as you tackle your day. We are a no shoes household, so I figured the equivalent for me is doing my hair and putting on pretty earrings!! Definitely helped me to feel more put together. Before bed, I did another Windex shining to keep my sink sparkling.

Day 3- Fly Lady says its time to check out the daily messages. I signed up for her email list; she advertised that she emails 10-12 times a day. In reality it is closer to 16 or more times a day. This is way too much for me! I unsubscribed, and decided to check the daily flight plans and other relevant information on her website. Again, Windexed the sink before bed and dressed to the earrings.

Day 4- Write reminders for yourself on post-its as the start of your "control journal." I have a To Do list I am referring to daily already, so I added my Fly Lady reminders to it. And checked the messages and shined my sink and dressed to the earrings.

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 Day 5- Instructed to write out my negative thoughts and replace them with positive ones, I thought it would be more beneficial to write Scriptures for my motivation in keeping a well-ordered home. Proverbs 31:27, Titus 2:3-5, Ecclesiastes 9:10, Ephesians 6:6-8, and Colossians 3:23 all come to mind. And once again I shined my sink before bed, dressed to the earrings in the morning, and checked out messages on her website. I am loving this shiny sink :).

All in all my Fly Lady experiment is proving beneficial so far. I feel energized and motivated, that shiny sink truly is a catalyst to greater cleanliness ;). Have you checked out Fly Lady yet? Wanna join me?

I'll just end with a quick re-cap of February's goals for you 3in30 gals:

1. Organize my office- successfully accomplished :), I am glad to report.
2. Establish a morning routine- not as successful. I have my list of things to do in the morning, but often am still in pj's at noon. Fly Lady is helping this area currently!
3. Read six books- Sad to confess, I only finished 4. The fifth was finished March 1st, and I still have thirty pages of Packer's Knowing God to finish. Hoping to do that and still read another 6 in March!

Check out my March goals here.

Thursday, March 1, 2012

March at the Purposeful Wife

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Ahh March, my heart is singing at the prospect of spring, and Lord willing opportunities to get out of doors with my little girl. Fairer weather and sunshine are such delights! I'm thankful for the mild winter we've had, yet still eagerly anticipating short-sleeve weather :).

I'm very excited to announce, that in honor of Spring-cleaning, I will be spending the month of March with Fly Lady! I've dabbled in her helpful website off and on for a couple of years, but I thought that in light of my need for order, structure, and new routines; taking her first month of baby beginner steps might be just what I need. I've even signed up for her e-mailing list and liked her on facebook :). Every Friday I plan to check in with you all on how it's going for me. This is goal #1 for 3in30. Stay tuned!

I will be continuing my reading through six books a month this March (goal #2).  The titles on my docket are:

1. For Motherhood or Marriage: Super Baby Food by Ruth Yaron (S is getting ready for solids! Also cool to note, the author is a local to my area of PA.)
2. For Women: Lies Women Believe by Nancy Leigh Demoss (I've owned this forever, and read most of it years ago. Thought it was time to really read it.)
3. For My Soul: Respectable Sins by Jerry Bridges (Our Church will be reading this for morning Bible Study.)
4. For My Education: Night by Elie Wiesel (Because everyone should read this book! And I am embarrassed to say I somehow graduated high school without having done so...)
5. For Homemaking: The Five Minute Solution by Mary Frances Budzik (I touched on the concept of making the most of your minutes here, and lo and behold their is an entire book devoted to the idea of what you can do in only five minutes! Intriguing.)
6. For Fun: The Horse and His Boy by C.S Lewis (I am continuing through the Chronicles of Narnia, which I read in childhood but haven't reviewed since. So delightful!)

I will be posting reviews as I complete them, so again, stay tuned. 

For goal #3 I will be carrying on with organizing my home one room a month, 15 minutes a day. The room for March is my kitchen! Excited and scared, this room may look okay on the outside, but the dark recesses of my cupboards and pantry could really use a purge and redo. It is not the efficient and useful space it could be. 

This is how March is looking for the blog. You can also expect more posts for preemie parents, lessons I'm learning along the way, and what's cooking in my kitchen. It should be good :). 

What does your March look like?

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